(Okay, so I'm technically 'playing JSE', but that's not a naughty pun now is it?)
Yesterday, I bought 13 shiny shares of Compagnie Financiere Richemont, which is a blue-chip company that owns luxury brands like Cartier and Chloe. They also own Net-A-Porter, which is filled with so many beautiful, overpriced things that it makes me want to cry. It's pretty great to think that, even though I'm very far away from affording the D&G bling on Net-A-Porter, I now own a molecule or two of every lovely thing on that site.
When I was looking for companies to invest in (using FNB's Share Builder) I noticed that almost all of the blue-chip companies on offer were based on everything that's wrong with the world. Would I like to put my money in tobacco, or liquor, or heartless oil giants? I'm surprised pornography conglomerates and puppy-stomping franchises weren't listed.
Random fact: did you know that the term blue-chip comes from poker, where the blue chips are the most valuable ones? I had to google this before I committed to actually buying some of them.
So anyway, the least sinful of the batch of companies was Richemont, so I went for it. I figured it couldn't be a worse investment than my recently ordered collection of Little Britain, which I'm super excited to get! And I spent about the same amount on both investing in my future; and Matt Lucas dressed as a wayward teen girl, Vicky Pollard, going "Yer but no but yer but no but SHARRUP!"
And while we're not on the subject at all, The *Poof!* Diet is going quite well. Most of The Pants are fitting again! Victory! Now I'm tempted to switch over to the half-the-calorie diet by Little Britain's FatFighters coach Marjorie Dawes, it goes like this: "You take your favourite food, and you only eat half of it. That way, it's only half the calories.... So you can have twice as much!" Solid logic.
Ah, Little Britain is amazing. You can watch most of it on Youtube. And you SHOULD! Because it's amazing. And my collection will arrive just in time to replace all the regular programming lost to some sort of kickball contest thing that everyone's excited about.
And another one from Vicky Pollard:
Social Worker: Vicky, where is the baby?
Vicky: Swapped it for a Westlife CD.
Social Worker: How could you do such a thing?
Vicky: I know, they're rubbish.